Category Archives: list

5 Things that Amuse Me

Note: If this is your first time to Total Fluff, please visit this brief explanation.

Hello, readers! I hope you had a wonderful weekend.

Now that the week has started again, I’m sure you’re looking for new ways to procrastinate! Or at least looking for things to amuse.

Seriously? You’re waiting until after the weekend to give some time wasters?

Of course. People are more likely to be outside and stuff on the weekend. But during the week? Looking at things on the internet is fair game. And anyways, don’t they need something to look forward to for the next weekend?

So, without further ado:

5 things that amuse me

1) I know that I’ve mentioned it before, but cakewrecks.com is one of my favorite blogs. Ever. (Not including this one, of course.) Jen Yates, the creator of the site, has an amazing sense of humor. Seriously, I think she’s one of my role-models in the blog sphere!

2) Looking at dessert recipes. And trying to figure out how to change them. One of my favorite recipe sites is allrecipes.com The dessert section has some inspiring ideas! And then after you get some ideas, you can do a Google search, and find other recipes and ideas. I came across recipes for ganache and flourless chocolate cake that are amazing. And now I’ve slightly modified them. And those are also fantastic. So you should check it out! Who knows what wonderful desserts you might find?

4) Pushing random buttons on my computer, and seeing what happens. Especially in different programs. I’ve actually discovered a lot of hotkeys this way! For example, do not press ctrl+w, ctrl+shift+w, or alt+f4 right now. Those would exit you out of this window/program, and that would make me sad.
Of course, one of the problems is that I not infrequently forget what I did to get a result… That led to an annoying time when I was using a word processor, and somehow got into “draft mode” and couldn’t figure out what I’d done, what combination of keys I pressed, or how to escape. I think I randomly got out of there, finally. But even now, I don’t know what I did. But seriously! It’s a lot of fun!

5) Darths & Droids. Once again, I’ve already mentioned this. But it’s hilarious. Especially if you’re at all aware of RPG culture and mechanics, and if you’re a Star Wars fan. Both parts are essential if you want to enjoy it. And be sure to read the description down at the bottom. It never ceases to amuse me. The authors have such an amazing sense of humor!

3) Trying to play with people’s minds in general. Did you notice that the lists is out of order? You can play with people’s minds in a variety of ways. One way is by figuring out odd ways of listing things. Another way is by coming up with random questions. And then asking people those questions. You really should see people’s expressions when I ask them “How would you respond if I made some sort of comment about pickle-headed stinkradishes of doom, death, and destruction right now?” It’s not dissimilar to the time I went around asking people about muffin-flavored shrimp. But playing with people’s minds is quite fun! You get some of the oddest looks.

Anyways, Happy Monday! I hope this provides some useful ways to amuse yourself for the week. These methods normally amuse me!

Elephant-like Animals: An Infographic

Note: if this is your first time to totalfluff.com, please visit this brief explanation.

Hello, readers! Happy Sunday!

For your perusal today, I created another infographic-

-Oh dear…

-This time about animals that are just like elephants!

Seriously? I think I’m leaving now. Since I apparently know more about the wildlife on your world than you do, this can’t end well.

Ooh, I finally got rid of Fluffy? Wonderful!

I saw that! No, I’m still here. I’m just going to try to ignore your monstrosity “infographic.”

Darn. Well, anyways. Here it is!

4 animals that are just like elephants!

An infographic about 4 animals that are just like elephants: rabbits, owls, armadillos, and Cheetahs

Happy Sunday!

Five Uses for Feather Boas (Alright, Ten)

Note: If this is your first time here, please visit this brief rundown. Thanks!

Happy Tuesday, folks! I hope your week started off well.

Well, with Irish music like what I found yesterday, how could it not have?

My, aren’t we full of ourselves today?

Oh, you are too?

Anyways, I’m here today to talk to you about one of the most delightfully fluffy fashion accessories on the face of the earth:

The Feather Boa

A Feather Boa? Snakes on your world have feathers?

Oh. No. Not that type of boa. No, Feather boas are a fashion accessory! They look a bit like this:

An Illustration of a fuzzy furry feather boa

Purple Fluff, in Accessory Form!

How GHASTLY!

Uh, what?

So. Flippin. Fuzzy. What do you even do with it?

Ah, how convenient! That leads me to the topic of:

Top Five Things to do with a Feather Boa

1) Wear it around your neck. It’s sort of like a big long feathery scarf.

That… would clash with everything. And it would get itchy.

Hush, Fluffy! Will you let me finish? Please?

Ok, ok, sorry. Finish your list…

Thank you. So as I was saying, if you wear it around your neck, it’s like a really long feather scarf. And really warm! After all, that fluff traps a lot of heat. It’s great for cold winter days.

2) Cut it to an appropriate length, and use it as a headband. Like with the scarf, it will keep your head warm. And be quite the daring look!

3) Give it to a child for dress-up. It adds instant class to any child’s wardrobe, and will let her have a lot of fun. The boas come in all sorts of colors! Hot Pink? Instant princess! Black? You’re princess Batman! Lime Green? Celebrity. And there are so many more!

4) Give to a child as a toy. And now the child can use it with her stuffed puppy as a leash! And that leash has such class.

5) Decorating. I haven’t actually tried this, but I imagine Red and Green Feather Boas can so easily be used to add festive cheer. Put them on the walls, around the windowsill, or anywhere where you’d normally use tinsel. This would provide a softer look. Let me know if that works? I imagine you can use pastel colors for a spring look. And so many more!

Well, there you go! Happy Tuesday!

 

I think this is where my main purpose comes into play… That was WAY to fluffy to be healthy. So, here we go:

Top 5 Things Fluffy Would Like to See Feather Boas Used For

1) fire-starters. Assuming they’re not made of non-flammable or toxic material, all that fuzz looks like it would start a fire amazingly. At the very least, it would get rid of the boa.

2) Fluffifier Decoys. Wanting to know who in the room is way too obsessed with fluff and fuzz? Pull out the feather boa. Toss it in some random direction. Watch and see how many people in the room go after it. Congratulations, you’ve now found all the Fluffifiers in the room!

3) Cleaning rag. Hopefully, by the time you’ve used it to wash enough greasy dishes, it will no longer be so… fluffy. At the very least, it will probably be a lot grungier, and therefore slightly less obnoxious.

4) A slingshot. And if you use sharp enough rocks or other projectiles, the fuzz will start to wear off. No more Feather Boa! Yay!

5) A rope Ladder. To a tree-house. Eventually, all that will be left is the base. And who knows, it might even attract more birds! And once again, you achieve the purpose of “no more feather boa.” And besides, what tree-house doesn’t need a snake-like creature hanging down from it?

And with that, readers, happy Tuesday!

Top 5 Uses for Mini-Marshmallows

Note: If this is your first time to totalfluff,please visit this brief explanation. Thanks!

Hello, everyone!

I’ve been looking at my website, and came across a disturbing fact about this website.

Just one?

Seriously, Fluffy? You couldn’t come up with anything more creative than that?

Anyways. The problem: The only place (before today) that marshmallows are mentioned on this site is in my FAQ section. This is clearly problematic. Marshmallows and fluff are practically synonymous, after all! So I am here today to FIX this problem! And so, without further ado, here are my

Top 5 uses for mini-marshmallows.

1) Eat. Just plain. Or better yet, give to a five year old and see what happens. You’ll definitely not be bored after that!

2) Use for office/dorm-battles. What happens if you combine a mini-marshmallow and a rubber-band gun, anyways? Or forget the gun, let’s just use the rubber-band!

Mini Marshmallow rubberband slingshot

Mini-Marshmallows Incoming!!

It would probably work better with a) a thicker rubber-band, b) an actual holdy-thingy like real slingshots have, and possibly c) full size marshmallows.

3) Hot Chocolate. Of course. Or maybe coffee. Regardless, putting them into a hot beverage to melt. And then drink. But you probably knew that, since you’re smart and stuff.

4) Snowball fights in California. Or during the summer. After all, Christmas in July is a thing, right? Why not celebrate with a “snowball” fight? (Of course, it once again works better with larger marshmallows. But minis can still squish into relative “snowball” shape, which can then be used for throwing at people.)

5) Marshmallow Taffy. If you haven’t tried this, you need to. I’ve illustrated/written down the instructions/recipe for marshmallow taffy in the recipes section. So you should check it out.

I hope this gives you some ideas! But what about you? Do you have any favorite uses for Mini Marshmallows?

What’s Worse than a Cold McDonald’s Fry?

Hello, everyone!

And Happy Saturday! Man, after yesterday’s post, I’m suddenly appreciating being able to say that.

Anyways, I hope that your weekend is going well. I love good weekends! Although there are few things more disappointing that a weekend going badly. Especially when it looks like it should be a good weekend. That’s really sad.

Speaking of things going badly, I asked some random people about French Fries. But not just french fries.

You know, you really need to work on your transitions…

Yeah, whatever. It worked, didn’t it? At least until you sidetracked me.

Anyways, as I was saying, without further ado:

What Are Five Things Worse than Cold McDonald’s French Fries?

5) Cold Fries from a cafeteria. Those are often just gross anyways, so making them colder makes them on about the same level as McDonald’s French Fries.

4) Molding Potatoes. They apparently smell bad, too.

Seriously, what is up with you and moldy things?

Ok, so, first of all, that was a response to the question. From a real person. Who I asked. And Second, this time at least I’m not justifying the mold, ok?

But back to the list.

3) I’m not sure, but I think that muffin flavored shrimp are probably fairly bizarre.

I hadn’t even realized those were considered “food”.

Moving on…

2) Deep Fried Lizards. Apparently, according to this source, you can buy them in Shanghai. Another friend tried to make the case that it didn’t sound too bad.

I guess it might depend on the size of the lizard, and whether you’re supposed to eat the bones. But it still sounds like it would probably be worse than a cold McDonald’s Fry.

1) Chocolate covered cicadas. I don’t think I need to add anything to this.

But anyways, I hope you have a great rest of your weekend, free from any of these foods!

5 Things that should NEVER be fluffy

So I was thinking recently-

Good for you!

You know that gets old, right?

Not to me…

Anyways. As I was saying, I was thinking. I can’t think of a single thing that isn’t better when fluffier. Cake, for example. And whipped cream.

So I think I’ve determined that nothing wouldn’t be amiss with some fluff.

Oh, I’d like to challenge that assertion.

If you think you can…

Easily.

Without further ado, here are

Five Things that Should NEVER be Fluffy

1) The inside of a cup.

No, that’s wrong.

Please tell me you’re not actually going to defend moldy cups…

It depends on how you define “moldy” and “fluffy”.

If we’re talking about moldy cups, as in you’ve left something in your cup for too long, of course that’s yucky. But, what if it’s a fish bowl? And your pet algae eater needs the algae growing inside your cup to survive?

But that’s gross.

It’s still better to have that algae, though. Otherwise, you’ll have a dead fish in your cup. And that’s really gross. Unless it’s cooked, of course. Then it’s just weird.

But also, soap is fluffy. As is whipped cream. So having a fluffier cup is a good thing.

Hmpf.

If I may continue? thank you.

2) Ice. Especially when you’re ice skating. If that’s fluffy, it’s going to gunk up your skates. Also, the fluffy can then hide the ice, which is a problem.

Wait, the Webmaster isn’t going to interrupt me? Will wonders never cease?

No, it’s that you’re actually right. For once.

Ah, there she is.

But moving on.

3) Cheese. Cheese should never be fluffy. Soft is ok; fluffy is not.

You’re wrong again.

What is it with you and liking molding things?

Once again, it’s not (just) mold, and this time, it really isn’t just me!

Some spreadable cheeses are amazing. Garlic and herb spiced cheese, that goes on crackers, is so good. So is the cranberry orange. And the garden vegetable goes really well in some casseroles. But in terms of moldy, Blue Cheese is basically just a specific type of moldy cheese. A moldy cheese that people really like.

… People on your world make cheese mold on purpose? And deliberately eat it? And this isn’t for a prank candy day?

Correct on all counts.

Darangeblits. That is totally bizarre.

Will you at least grant that Cheddar should never be fluffy?

For right now, ok. You win this one. That’s 1.5 for 3. Ish.

Whatever.

4) Sandpaper. If Sandpaper is fluffy, that completely defeats the purpose. I can’t even imagine how sand paper would be fluffy. But I wager it wouldn’t work.

Fair enough. Unless you put the fluff on the back of the sandpaper, to make it easier to get rid of spare dust and stuff.

… You’re deliberately trying to infuriate me, aren’t you?

Anyways, 5) Teeth. Human teeth. While the person is still alive.

Are you going to try to defend that, webmaster?

Uh, no. I don’t think so.

Well there you go. Five things that shouldn’t be fluffy. Ever.

two-and-a-half.

FINE. Whatever. But you do acknowledge that there are some things that shouldn’t be fluffy?

Ok. For right now, I’ll accept that there appear to be some things that probably shouldn’t be fluffy. At least not all the time.

I guess I’ll take that for now.

Anyways, Happy Thursday!

5 legends about the Dik Dik

I have recently come across a new favorite small animal: the Dik Dik.

You and everyone else on the internet…

I’m just trying to stay up to date on trends!

Anyways, I thought I’d list 5 of my favorite legends about Dik Diks.

Five Legends of Dik Diks, that May Be Composed on the Spot

  1. The Dik Dik is named for the sound its hoofs make when it walks. dik-dik dik-dik, dik-dik dik-dik… I don’t know if this is true or not. If it isn’t true, it should be!
  2. Dik Diks are leprechauns in disguise. I mean, look at them. Dik Diks are about 8 inches tall; leprechauns are about 8 inches tall. There’s the correlation. And as every student knows, correlation implies causation! So therefore, Dik Diks are Leprechauns. QED.
  3. Dik Diks can jump higher than an average house. This is due to their legs being stronger than they appear, and the fact that the average house doesn’t jump.
  4. Dik Diks are some of the last signs that fairies are real. After all, if they’re leprechauns in disguise, fairies clearly exist. Even if they are not leprechauns in disguise, those miniature animals must be used for something: Mounts for the Queen of Fairies! Therefore, fairies are clearly real.
  5. If you stare too long into a Dik Diks eyes, you get pulled into space. I mean, seriously. Have you seen pictures of their eyes? Those adorable little deep black eyes of absolute cuteness? They’re just calling for you to get lost in them. And to fall of the end of the world into space.

So, there you go! Happy Friday!

For the record, I don’t agree with any of that post. Except for the “happy Friday”, part. That I agree with. So, have a great weekend!

You are given an Angry Banana: How do you respond? (2)

Hello, everybody! Welcome back to the top responses to being given an angry banana! We left off at four.

Oh. You were serious about making it two parts.

Of course! You were emphatic about my getting enough material. And since I had enough for two posts, I’m going to use it!

So, back to:

Top Ten Responses To: “You are given an Angry Banana. Now what?”

6. Use it as a boomerang. If you use a banana, that’s just sort of lame. If you use an angry banana, there’s a slim possibility that it will go out of its way to hit your target, because it’s angry. Or it might refuse to come back, because it’s angry. Which means that you wouldn’t need to worry about dealing with an angry banana. Or, it might refuse to hit the person you aimed at, and then come back and hit you in the face.

Ooh, that actually sounds fun…

8. Slap someone in the face. Slapping someone in the face is just silly. Slapping someone in the face with an angry banana? That brings it up to epic. “I slap you in the face with a banana. An ANGRY banana. BWAHAHA!”
9. A-peel to its better nature. I don’t actually know how to respond to this one…
10. Pacify it with an amiable grapefruit. Maybe the banana’s angry because it’s lonely! If you give it a friend, and a friendly friend, I bet it would get much more cheerful. After all, wouldn’t you be happier with an amiable grapefruit buddy?

So there you go, folks! Ten uses for an Angry Banana.

Wait a second… I think you mean 9.

What?

I saw what you did there. You changed the last 7 to 8. Instead of 9.

Ok… So I may have been slightly off on how many best responses I have… So fine, real ten: Do a close up portrait of its expression.

Angry Banana Eyes

Angry Banana’s Angry

Happy Friday, everyone! I hope you have a great weekend.

Here, Have an Angry Banana.

I can’t think of anything I can write about fairly quickly, so here’s a picture of an angry banana.

Angry Banana

The banana’s ANGRY!!!

Well, there you go! Happy-

No. You are NOT calling this an adequate fluff.

Wha?

This is way too short. Go out there, and find more content.

Even though you likely won’t like what I come up with?

Hey, you wrote the post. And if you don’t get the wordcount up to at least 200, I’m writing the post.

…Fine. Just give me a few minutes.

Bwahaha! Some way of possibly getting to post again! Hmm, now what will I write about when the Webmaster fails? Ancient Spring traditions of my home? Magic rituals…? Oh, the possibili-

I’m back, and I have content!

If you don’t write it, it didn’t happen.

Well, you’re in luck, because without further ado:

The Top Ten Responses to “You are given an Angry Banana: How do you respond?” (Part 1)

  1. Eat it. This seems obvious. After all, if you eat it, it will no longer be angry.
  2. Study it. Why is the banana angry? Were its parents mean to it as a child? Is it suffering from disillusionment about the egocentricity of the political atmosphere of the current world?
  3. Plant it in the ground. Maybe it will sprout more. Then maybe you can have a whole army of angry bananas!
  4. Walk away slowly. After all, what might an angry banana come up with to do to you? You never can tell.

Oh, look! I’m at about 250 words. I guess I’ll make this a two-part post! Thank you Fluffy!

…Blast. I mean, you’re welcome.

Maybe some day there will be actual content on this blog again…

Well, happy Thursday, folks! Tune in tomorrow for the 2nd half of the The Top Ten Responses to “You are given an Angry Banana: How do you respond?”